It is spring or near the end of spring. On the outside I feel like spring, bright, sunny and energetic. But inside the feeling is more like fall, removing myself from life, declining, a time of harvest and change.

This morning our faith sharing group discussed books we read that we thought were important in life. The majority of the books, I observed, were nonfiction. One person said how when he was young he was told nonfiction books were for the real readers and fiction books were a waste of time. I must admit that I used to read a lot of fiction but in the recent past it has been nonfiction. I do, I must admit, feel guilty about reading novels. I have been listening these days on my phone to the audio recording of “Crime and Punishment” from the library while doing other things. I am enjoying the novel but do feel guilty about taking time to read this great work of fiction.

Spring and summer are a time of imagination, wonder and growth. Fall and winter are times of slowing down, not wasting time and striving forward. So my outsides are saying it is spring, a time of growth, while my insides are saying it is fall, a time of dying and slowing down. My insides say slow down and read, even fiction, but my outsides say keep on doing and going.

Life is a four season event, all at the same time. So it my feel like spring outside and like fall inside but that is just the way it is.

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