Sophia with parents and
grandparents

Last night I went to the 8th grade graduation of my goddaughter, Sophia. She graduated with 12–15 other youth from a small private school in Milwaukee. Her parents and grandparents, pictured on the side, were present. Today Sophia came over to work a few hours on our gardens. Tomorrow my grandson, Dustin, is coming over with his parents and sister. He is also graduating from 8th grade. It will be next Monday with 75–100 other youth from a large public school in a small city in Northwestern Brown County. He and family are coming tomorrow for his basketball tournament this weekend in West Allis. This is the graduation events I will be attending. My grandchildren’s cousin, my daughter-in-law sister’s son is graduating from Middleton High school next Friday. However, we cannot attend the ceremony.

I think back to my own eighth grade graduation fifty seven years ago from St. Thomas Aquinas Catholic School, one that no longer exists. Eight grade graduations is no longer such a major event as it was in 1957 but still is a milestone in life. It marks the end of childhood and transition into a full bodied teenager. Life was slower in 1957 but the change from grade or middle school to high school remains a big leap.

When I was teaching in school or religious education I always thought that youth between seventh grade and sometime around 10th grade where the hardest to teach. They had lost the innocence of childhood and had not yet the ability to reason and conceptualize that high school youth possess. If you cannot play with their innocence or reason with them they can be difficult. Youth in these middle years, I observed, say what they say and do what they do, without the hesitation of a child or rationale awareness of a teenager. As a teacher and religious educator I would console parents at time by saying they would grow out of this stage. I found it is better to go with the flow in being with them.

Rap music was big with this age group so I told the youth that I could rap. They asked me what my ‘rap name’ was and, after some thought, came up with the name ‘reject.’ My raps were just silly rhyming but the kids thought they were funny. For a few years when I was a youth minister for a Church and had to organize some middle school dances. With the help of one of the parents we found an excellent young man who was a DJ and good at playing rap music. Our dances became very popular with middle school teens who came from across the city to our dances. Near the end of my time at this Church, after teens wanted me to rap more, we set up a ‘rap off’ between me, ‘reject’ and this DJ, who I think was called D Rock. The DJ, with some of his friends helped me with my rap. I thought the DJ who played rap music so well would be excellent at rap. I went first at the ‘rap off’ and, to no one’s surprise, was not very good. The D.J. went next and, to everyone’s surprise, had not prepared a rap, and was just awful. One of the students sum it up when he told me in young teen language, that I sucked by the DJ sucked worst.

I learned with experience how to be with young teens who say what they thought but without the innocence of a child or reflection of older teen. In fact, people today, although I am the ripe age of 71, say at times that I still do the same thing, think fast and say out loud what I am thinking without considering the consequences. Maybe I really never outgrew ‘reject’ and at times am just a young teen making the leap into life.

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