In the last few days I have heard from a family member and friend, who I have lost contact with a long time ago. One the benefits of email and Facebook is to offer me a chance to reestablish contact with friends and family. There are always good memories when renewing contacts. Keeping in touch with family and friends, past or present, is important.
One thing I have observed, however, is that my friends that I am in regular contact with since I retired almost 10 years ago are not the same ones I had before I retired. In general, they are more racially diverse and poorer. More than before some have disabilities. This is probably due to the fact that since I no longer work for a living, I have had more time to do “works of mercy”, corporal, like helping to take people to doctor appointments or spiritual, like lovingly admonishing those who I see doing wrong. Doing various “works of mercy”, however, had made for more work than less work since retirement.
Today I met with a young woman of Cuban\Mexican descent who is working on the nonviolent action, poor people’s picket, on Saturday. She suggested we meet at the Fuel Café, not knowing the significance of the coffee shop for me. My deceased son Peter used to live nearby in River West and made the Fuel Café, one of his regular hang outs. When he was healthy of mind he was well like there and, I believe, even worked there for awhile. When he was sick of mind he was not wanted there and, I believe, at one time was even banned from being there. This place, like friends and family members of the past brought back many memories, some of them, however, not very blessed. When I told this young woman about my son and this coffee house she told me about a family member who also suffered from a mental health illness. Later she said it was my son that probably influenced her to have us meet at this location.
Being in the Fuel café brought back some happy memories of my son. Although since his death I feel a cloud of death around me, I feel he has brought me, his “best friend”, some peace and joy even in times of being rejected or ignored. Death and life fully experienced can give us sadness and joy to keep going on.
Friends and family like Peter and ones of the past or present are necessary for life. Enjoy friendships.
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